HOW TO NOT FAIL AS A DENTIST - Chapter 4
CHAPTER 4
“GIVE YOUR PATIENT WHAT THEY NEED, SOMETIMES, IT IS NOT WHAT THEY WANT”
by Dr. BAK NGUYEN
As doctors and dentists, we hold a very particular position. On one hand, we are in authority to almost dictate the course of action to heal a patient. On the other hand, we are doing our best to please and seduce the clientele… especially when you own your practice!
What felt awkward and unease at the beginning came to be a blessing to me. Standing on a very thin line, I came to become a better man. With the years, it came to become a much simpler question to me: I will treat my patient as if I was in the chair or if I was treating my wife and friend. In short, I treat them as family… and they responded as kind.
That’s how my confidence grew. But my function is to serve as a doctor and a surgeon… it is not easy to take the decision to just… cut! By the end of the day, that’s the reason people are coming to see you, to have your OPINION as a doctor that they trust.
“Give your patient what they need, sometimes, it is not what they want.”
Dr. Bak Nguyen
Usually, it is a straight forward process. They come in with a need or a desire. You identify the problem and the solution. You explain and guide them through the decision process. Then, you execute the plan. What they need and what they want are now the same thing.
It was possible because to took the patient’s needs and brought them into your ground, where you have control of the science, the craft and the emotions.
Some times, people have alternate motives, whatever they might be. What they need has nothing to do with what they want. Even if you are the kindest of soul, resist the temptation to slip on their ground.
Never leave your ground. Take their desires and needs in, hold them by the hand, but treat them on your ground, on your terms, medical and professional terms.
You will see that kind of situation when a patient is not listening, arguing even after the diagnosis and is simply trying to micromanage your treatment and the way to are dispensing it. Dentists tend to be that kind of patients…
Be kind, be patient and be firm. You are the one treating. They have chosen to trust you, so they must learn to trust and to let go of their insecurities.
You will prove them right to have trust you only once you have performed your duties. And in the operating room, once you have received consent, your duty is to lead.
“The title and the white coat are about a function, not an identity.”
Dr. Bak Nguyen
Once you remove your mask, remember to also step down the authority you were given. Now, it is your duties to explain and comfort. Yes, comfort, you are a doctor, and you are treating people.
This is the obvious part. Here are the tricky situations:
A patient comes in and complains about a broken tooth. The patient also complained about the previous dentist that he saw… Your job is to listen and identify the complaint of your patient. So what is the complain here? If it was the pain, you have the science and the craft to help. But it the main complaint was about his past experience or the cost of the profession or the waiting time… stay on your guard.
Often, all it will take is for them to let it out of their system and to calm down. But a few situations they are so frustrated that they have built a wall around themselves and they are not available to listen to the remedy of their situation.
Remember your function and the role you have been given, to listen, to care and to treat. If the complaint was within your means to treat, be patient, and they will come to reason soon enough. But remember, never treat a patient before you feel that he/she is ready and is trusting you. You are not there to prove yourself, you are there to perform.
On the other hand, if that patient's complaint is not the health issue you have identified, be kind and say the truth: what they need is beyond your ability!
I will repeat that in front of a camera every single time: I only treat people that I feel capable of helping. The others, I have the duties to tell them that I am not capable of delivering what they want.
Of course, I can perform dentistry! Of course, I can heal and comfort! On top of that, I can help people regain their hope and confidence. But if someone is looking for justice or to be proven right, I do not have that ability.
As a doctor, I will give them the time of consultation and will tell them the truth. This, in my opinion, is what you need and if you agree, we can proceed.
In the case that what you need (in my professional opinion) differs from what you want (which you are entitled to), I am unfortunately not the right person to help you.
Always use the verb I AM NOT THE RIGHT PERSON, it will show both confidence and humility. Those situations might not arise often, but you need to be prepared to face them. If you failed to identify the main complaint of your patient, you are heading for disaster and much headaches.
In my first years, I was always that kind heart looking to please and to comfort (I still am now, but I’ve matured), I faced those situations with the conviction that if I do my best, they will come around. Eventually, they did, but I had to not only perform as a dentist but also to absorb whatever frustration and injustice they suffered from the past.
Trust me, it is not your duty, responsibility and place to do so. It was time-consuming, and by the next appointment, you have to do it all over again.
You can’t give security to someone convinced that they are in danger. You can’t comfort someone who holds tight to their fears. You can’t and do not have the right to treat someone who refuses treatment.
“In my book, to consent to treatment is to trust.”
Dr. Bak Nguyen
Trust has to be earned and given. It will take time, but it has to be available. So if within the initial consultation, I failed to establish trust and genuine communication between my prospect patient and my myself, I will not move forward.
This is a very important lesson: be open and learn to recognize your limits. In other words, if you can’t help that person, you have to say no, loud and clear.
I am a YESMAN, I say YES but default and then reevaluate. I’ve spent 12 months saying systematically YES to everything. I learned, I survived, and I grew. And I am still telling you to learn to say NO as a doctor and a dentist in those specific situations!
That’s what I meant when I said to GIVE YOUR PATIENTS WHAT THEY NEED, NOT JUST WHAT THEY WANT. Give them the truth. You don’t have to be harsh, be kind and firm.
That being said, those are usually not the majority of your treatments nor patients. In 20 years + treating patients from my first day in dental school to my private practice, I will tell you that it might be less than 5% of your patients.
Most of them are looking for a solution and for someone worthy of their trust. They will often react to you and adapt to the feeling that you are establishing together. Good, you are both committed and building trust. But, if someone is constantly talking about his past experiences, they are not available to build anything new just yet. Give them time, but stand your ground.
With this, I am concluding the first part of this journey with you, the PROFESSIONAL INTELLIGENCE. Those aren’t taught at school and have to be acquired with experience. Well, this is what I gathered and distilled from the field.
I called it PROFESSIONAL INTELLIGENCE, but it can also be pretty close to EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE. It is mainly the mastery of the awareness of oneself, the other and the environment.
To be aware of ourselves is to be confident.
To be aware of the other is to be kind.
To be aware of the environment is to be wise.
We have a beautiful profession and vocation: to heal people and to help them smile! Keep both the healing and smiling in mind, and you will deliver happiness and find yours on the way.
On that, trust me, I wasn’t born to be a dentist, the smile and trust of my patient made me into a great and good dentist, according to my patients! Maybe not all of them, but by most of them.
HOW TO NOT FAIL AS A DENTIST is my gift to you, what I’ve learned from 20+ years perfecting my craft and science. The PROFESSIONAL INTELLIGENCE is only one part of the equation. To find happiness and fulfilment, you and I will need more.
The next part of this journey is FINANCIAL INTELLIGENCE, how to see the real math and logic of our profession and prestige. To some, that knowledge will empower you to great wealth. To other, it will save you from sure disasters and a life of misery. But most, it will give you the means to afford time and happiness.
Money doesn’t make happiness… FINANCIAL INTELLIGENCE will! Are you ready for more?
This is MILLION DOLLAR MINDSET applied to dentistry. This is HOW TO NOT FAIL AS A DENTIST.
This book is not about understanding THE DIFFERENT FACETS of what it means to become a DOCTOR IN DENTAL MEDICINE
Dr. BAK NGUYEN